Week 2

So this week has gone a little better. We weren't too busy at work because a couple of the surgeons have left for a little bit. I find that being at work feels like a little bit of home to me. Even though I'm working with new people from all over the world, surgery is still surgery and it's something familiar to me. This is nice because everything else is very unfamiliar.

I still know that this is where I'm supposed to be right now but I don't entirely know why yet. It has been harder than I thought it would be for me to make friends. I appreciate everyone at home so much more now and realize the beauty of many of the relationships I have with people from home. Christ has done a lot in all of those relationships in the past couple of years and I miss and love you all so much.

I don't want you guys to think that I am not ok. Don't get me wrong, this is very hard, but I have confidence in the Lord that He knows way better than I do what is best for me and what things I need to learn. I have peace knowing that I am in His will. All of your prayers have helped so much too. I really need that to stand firm and keep my faith in Him alone.

I could definitely use prayer in finding where I fit in here. The community here is different than I thought it would be. A lady summed it up pretty well last night in, "You come expecting one thing, but it seems like the focus here is more on community and socializing than it is on the hospital." This is a disappointment to me because I had expected to see more passion for helping people see Christ. I have made an attempt to have meaningful conversations with different people, but I have only found it going anywhere with a few people. These few all have either left already or will be gone by Wednesday. This makes it hard, but so far God has really provided someone for me to talk to when I really needed it. I pray and trust that He will continue to provide for me. It's been weird because I am pretty comfortable with who I am at home, but it has been hard here trying to find that comfort.

I also am still seeking how God wants me to use my time here. I don't want to get home and have missed the whole point of me being here.