Ninja Path

I'm always curious about God's plan for me in this life.  Like the things He has put on my heart, my desires, things I want to leave behind.  I want my life to look different than the avid Sunday church-goers.

Jesus' life looked different.

I'm also scared of what this might bring.  I know the material things of this world can be destroyed by moths yet I find some things sentimental.  I also think I really need some things just to make my life easier.  Some people don't have life's luxuries though.  Sometimes I'd like to be a nomad.  Just here, there, everywhere without being tied down.  The problem is that I am tied down.  I bought a house and have student loans.  I think it'd be nice to not have these burdens yet even without the two I'm still left with a bunch of stuff.  Where does it all go?  Where do I go?  I'm a big fan of comfort, but I don't want to waste my life away hearing of other people's stories wishing I'd stepped out.

Lord, I need your guidance on where to go, how to get there and who I am.  I'll keep walking but make Your path clear.  Help keep my eyes on You and to not be distracted.  It's so easy for me to do.  I can't do any of this without You.

He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose.  - Jim Elliot

Plain Jane

I'm terrified that my life will be a typical story.  I want so bad for God to do great things through me. 

I don't think I've been doing my part though.

I feel sometimes that there's a fine line between legalism and discipline.  I'm also finding that either side of any fine line that can be drawn in life, it's wrong.  Christ is the fine line.  He resolves all the issues.

My heart hurts right now for the people that don't know God, and I'm not sure which makes it worse:  the ones that know of Him and claim Him but have no relationship with Him or the ones that have never heard this sweet saving name of salvation.

My heart is in Africa.  It has been really hard dealing with negative feedback on going.  I wish they could see the point.  I really should expect the rejection more, but it continues to surprise me.  I feel like a regular ol' person.  I have no great talent or boldness that has been achieved on my own.